It’s been tough.
I’m trying “distraction” to stay somewhat engaged. By this, I mean that I am acting as if I were going to race in the SHTP 2025. I even started this little thread on their forum.
I’ve been doing bits of boat work and sailing rarely. Most recently, I’ve replaced the boom-end sheaves, and a damaged lifeline, and cleaned the seawater strainer. I’ve ordered parts to service the engine again. Technically I should have the rubber seal for the sail drive replaced fairly soon since it’s on a 7-year cycle and the last change was done in 2017. I think I’m going to stretch this one though.
The biggest blockers for my participation in the SHTP 2025 are:
- Getting my qualifying cruise done: every time I manage to line up 3 days, the weather doesn’t cooperate.
- Getting support at work: they’ll be fine for the way down. But I’m not sure they’ll be happy about the way back. All in all, for me, the best would be to take 6 weeks off.
- Getting myself a liferaft: this one should be easy to sort out as money is all that’s needed here.
- And not the least: being energized. See next …
Like I said, it’s been tough. It’s super unlikely that anyone reads this so I’m going to get personal a bit. The kid left home for college in Paris last September. I moved out of the home to a place in Half Moon Bay. That turned out sour and I’m now in Pacifica, hopefully for the better. My grand plan was that I would find a partner to rebuild my life. But that didn’t work out, not even close. So now I battle loneliness. All friends are essentially my wife’s (well, that’s how it’s turned out). My socialization happens through work (online meetings), soccer games (when I referee), the landlords upstairs, a rare meeting with my wife to discuss the practicalities of the divorce, and that’s it. Not optimal … it grimly highlights my poor social skills, I suppose. And dating is proving to be completely dry.
I wake up, work, eat, work more, exercise or referee a few games, shower, cook, watch TV, sprinkle grocery shopping in there sometimes. On weekends, I call my mom, sometimes I catch my daughter.
The saddest part, I think, is that I feel like my creative juices and energy for living have been sucked out of me. Not completely, but not what it was for sure.
Bleak … I manage and try to enjoy the little things. I mean, f**k, I could have been born in Gaza, Ukraine, afflicted with something. I’m healthy, wealthy. I just need to love myself and life a bit more. WIP …
Hey Philip, I a reading this (no you are not alone lol) and so I read news I was not aware of. In case you read my comment let’s get in touch. We will talk sailing. I have been trying to do things on my side far less ambitious but that fill the bucket list. Take care buddy.
Phillip,
Hang in there; you’ll make it through. I hope you can stay close to your daughter. You should come race sometime with us on HiJinks. We can share some sailing stories and debate the merits of going to the dark side – cruising.
Philippe, hang in there. You have friends—including me! Whether you race to Kauai in June, perhaps keep to that intention. I’ll be there on s/v Pamela offering support for the race committee and the inbound singlehanders. It’s a good community to be involved with—as you know!